Apple Valley. Episode 2.
Welcome to Apple Valley.
A nominally sized, everyday Midwestern town that at one time lay between an apple grove and the famous Nameless River. The apple trees died in the great freeze of 1977 but the name stayed as permanent as the graffiti on the door of the women’s restroom at the Ginger Head Park, just down the road from the Cheese Castle and Palatino Trailer Park.
INT. BARRY’S OFFICE – LATE MORNING
This office is more of a half garage than an office. The slab floor is cold, always, and gray metal racking shelves act as filing cabinets. His desk barely fits his Barry’s goblin-esque stature and he sits in a throne of an office chair; the back towers over his balding mullet head. Barry squeezes a hand gripper while facing Ray and two young men who sit on stools.
Barry: Okay, fellas, welcome to the city crew. You’re gonna be workin’ with Ray here.
Ray: Hi, guys.
The two guys are Dex and Eric. Eric is a skinny eighteen-year-old with long blond hair and a hemp necklace. Dex is a well-built, quiet twenty-year-old. They both say hi to Ray.
Barry: So, Eric you kind of look like one of those hippie dumb shits.
Eric is thrown and doesn’t know how to respond. Is he serious? An asshole?
Barry: Just kidding, kid. Don’t smoke dope on the job though, we got cops crawling all over the goddamn place. . . So Dex. Is that short for something?
Dex: Nope.
Barry: Bullshit. We’re gonna call you Pete.
Dex: Pete?
Barry: Yeah, Dex is kinda queer sounding or something.
Ray: Bare.
Barry: Oh shit. I’m sorry. It’s kind of old boys club around here but we’re really trying to be PC, well, some of us are. I didn’t mean to offend you.
Dex: It’s fine.
Barry: So, Pete, it says here that you go to college.
Dex: I’m a sophomore at Wisconsin.
Barry: That’s cool. What’s your major?
Dex: Psychology.
Barry: Oh good. Maybe you could help me, I got this ex-wife and she’s turned my kids against me and the courts take the mother’s side and we need smart guys like you to help us dad’s. I mean when you get your degree, you could represent me, help us dad’s out.
Ray: Bare, he’s not gonna be a lawyer.
Barry: He could do it. Couldn’t ya Pete?
Ray: No, Barry. No.
Barry: Bah. So, Pete, you’re brother worked for us, right?
Dex: Yeah. That’s correct.
Barry: “Correct” eh. College boy. Well he told us a lot about you… and you know, I’m really sorry about that gay comment.
Dex: What about it? I mean, why would I care?
Barry: I think you boys are gonna fit in just fine around here. You don’t seem to mind some ball busting and you both seem good.
Ray: I don’t mean to break up the men’s sensitivity circle, but it’s almost lunch so I’ll take you guys out to lunch, not you Barry, and I’ll fill ya in on what you guys’ll be doing.
Eric and Dan say “sweet” at the same time.
Barry: Check it out, Ray, they’re tepalactic/
Ray: You mean, telepathic?
Barry: What the fuck is “telepathic?”